Finally back home.
Been out the whole day.

Teachers' Day celebration in mj in the morning.
Had the Aces day dance.
Then concert.
Concert was okay. Much better than national's day.


Pretty pretty balloons in the pretty pretty decorated hall. [Sounds familiar?] (:

Anw,
after today's class party, I suddenly miss tkg a lot a lot.
Hmm. Actually I just miss the ambience and everything.
Ahhhh.

And stupid Louis Chua went to suddenly dab cake cream on my cheeks for no reason. Was innocently standing there and watching them eat the cake. Kind of guessed he'll do that coz he came behind. But still, I didn't thought he actually will do it. Okay. What am I talking.

So cabbed back to tkg after that.
Or at least TRIED to hail a cab.
Before that, look at this.


Was upstairs slacking when they were cutting the cake. See the number of umbrellas opened? HAHA. I'd have died out there in the hot sun anw. So yea.

Back to the cab part.
We spent like... 30mins or more trying to get a cab can.
Walked further away from school and tried hailing cabs along the way, but to no avail. There were like 1038575 other ppl trying to get cabs as well.
We jaywalked to and fro to opposite directions for like 5 times. Oh gosh.
Then we decided to take bus down to somewhere.
Alighted at somewhere and tried hailing cabs. BUT ended up calling for a cab.
Oh gosh.

Met up with fellow 4e3 ppl. <3>"We're really like the best class that we even the teachers are afraid of us."

HAHA. And true enough, heard that most of our teachers are scared of us in the sense that they feel stressed when they enter the class. Coz we'll be [especially the scholars] asking tons of questions whenever they explain anything wrongly.

But look at how weird my ex-classmates can be.


Look at Abah. She said she wanted to sit down and she just sat down in the middle of nowhere and at the entrance of cineleisure. [But thank God not the main entrance]


And FAD!
Who was busy camwhoring with Elis's phone and holding the phone up to high just to take a photo photos of herself. HAHA.


And I so miss Elisse. My darling classmate for 4 years. And lab partners for Sec 1 and Sec 2. And then lab bench mates for Sec 3 to 4. HAHA. (:

Went to Tampines for dinner with Elis, Jean, Fil, Fad and Hamizah.
Were crapping and everything.

Fil: Eh. What did the black cat said to the white cat? [that joke]
Fad: Arh?
Fil: Riddle.
Fad: Errr. Why did you dye?
Fil and me: *gave "huh" face and silence* [We thought we heard "Why did you die?"]
Fad: As in. Why did you dye your colour.
Us: HAHAHAHAH.
Fil: WRONG.
Fad: Errrr. Are you anemic? [That sickness. Low blood count. If some may not know.]
Us: HAHAHAH.

Oh gosh. Fad has the weirdest thinkings.
Like who will come up with such answers. HAHA.

And and..

Jean: Eh you all must come online later arh.
Me: What if I don't?
Jean: Then I'll kill you lor.
Me: What if Filza doesn't.
Jean: Then I'll kill her lor.
Me: What if Fad doesn't.
Fad: She won't kill me.
Me: Huh why.
Fad: Coz when she kills everyone she'll still at least have me.
-silence-
Fil: Ohmy. That's worse.

HAHAHA.

Sighh. About 3 more weeks left to promos.
Yet so many things else to worry about.
Focus. Priorities.
Everything else can wait.

Argh.
PW sux..

HAHA.
That sounds so familiar.

Speaking of familiarities,
Filza was announcing today:

Fil: I will start mugging like siao on Saturday.
Me: *shocked*
Fil: Umm. That sounds very familiar.

HAHAHAHA.
THIS TIME WE MUST MUST MUST MUG VERY VERY HARD!!!
If not... No more chances le. ):

Stayed back after school. Went West Plaza and bought cup noodles plus my darling nice nice japanese rice crackers. Went back to school and ate. Then Fil and I headed down to White Sands to shop for shorts. In the end our 'Be yourself day' theme changed to: CLASS TEE PLUS ANY BOTTOMS.
So fickle minded lahh. One minute say Angel Devil, the next Hip-Hop, then now we're back to square one. HAHA.

But seriously, I think the whole 'Be yourself day' thingy is so crap.
I MEAN. If it was really Be yourself, THEN why even restrict all the rubbish things like no slippers and why is there even a need for a theme. I wear slippers like all the time can. [Except in school lahh.]
Oh wells.

Sheesh. I'm falling asleep and I still have to have mass conference for PW later at 10.30. ):
PW seriously sux. So screwed..

Atiqah joined us later at White Sands.
On the way back to school,
somehow we crapped sth really funny out.

Atiqah: His mouth open so wide that even a fly can fly in.
Me: Maybe we should just throw something in.
Atiqah: Like "Oops. Sorry. Accidentally throw sth in."
Fil: HAHAHA.

Can't rmb what we really said.
But the conclusion was we came up with a rhyming thing and a new nickname for someone.

Just Bin

HAHAHA.
Okay. Inside joke.

Went back to school and slacked.
Bottom line is, we did nothing productive today.
And well.
Today Fil and I thought through things and realise that things aren't excatly that bad after all.
Actually there isn't any major problem with it..
So?
Just get along.

What is your heart's deepest regret?
Maybe it's me.
Maybe you wished that you didn't even start anything.
Maybe you think that it was a mistake.
Maybe..

But I never regretted it.
Maybe just regret not trying hard enough to save everything.

Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came-

Today was such a.... tiring day.

Woke up like earlier than usual to go for the Green Walk thingy to school.
Arranged to meet Wuss. But due to some miscommunications, we ended up missing 3 of our respective buses. Finally met up and was thinking of whether to cab down since we're like damn damn late. HAHA. In the end we decided to just take bus down and drop off somewhere then join the class to walk.
So funny lahhh.

The walk was okay. Not tiring at all.

Hmm. Breezed through the day. Slack periods. Except for GP, which we had to do this timed comprehension practise. Omggg. Nearly died. Damn hard lah. We were like whispering and everything to ask about meanings. HAHA.

After that went Lee Jin's house with Le Dung. They doing teachers' day card and I just went for fun. Been there once before during pae with some ppl from 07S209 [PAE]. I miss my old class many many much. ):
And Lee Jin has a new dog. [The old one ran away.] A Chihuahua. Named Huahua. [Actually it's pronounced as "wa wa"] HAHAHA. Damn damn cute lah. So hyper and everything. HAHA. But Lee Jin says it's scared of strangers and will shiver when you get too close.
After awhile it was okay already. lol. So so cute.
It'll come running to you when you call out its name. Ahhh. I love Huahua. <3





Ohoh. And when we were at Compass Point KFC eating our lunch, this guy came over and asked Lee Jin to do survey. It was so funny. The questions.

One of it was:

Guy: Where do you stay?
Lee Jin: Sengkang [We are at Sengkang.]
Guy: How are you going to go home from here?
Lee Jin: By foot.
Me: *laughs* [the way he said it was so funny.]
Lee Jin: Er no no. By mrt.
*pause*
Lee Jin: *LAUGHS*
Me: Huh what.
Lee Jin: I say I stay in Sengkang then still take mrt. Get it or not.
Me: HAHAAH.

Okay. Maybe it wasn't that funny. But it was funny at that point in time.

Stayed till like 6pm. Half the time I was playing with Huahua.
Then cabbed home with Le Dung.
Yepp.
And I'm not studying AGAIN. ):

Ohno Ohno.

Ohya.


PRETTY RIGHT. Le Dung's new GC. Omg. So prettyyy.
If there is a fully white GC, I'll just buy it can. That'll be prettier.

1 and a half more days.
Please just let me survive it.
No more nonsenses please.
Let's just all..
get along.

I wanted to put this picture up of Le Dung's new GC.
Omg. It's damn pretty I tell you.

BUT. My ipod's connected to the com and I'm lazy to use the back USB port to connect my handphone to transfer the photos in.
Next time then.
Hahaha.

Chem test today was okay. Just that I was rushing through the whole thing and trying to change the free radical substition mechanism I drew wrongly. And I didn't even attempt multiple choice. And I stupidly put Option A for everything and it seems like nobody got A as their answer? HAHAHA. OMG. How dumb can I get. Should have put B. ):
And I was so sad after that.

Ah wells..
I'm so tired.
Still have to do physics assignment which is long overdue [sorry Mr Cha] and GP reading assignment which is due tmr. [And I don't intend to start until tmr]

The bus ride back home today was unusually fun.
Coz well.
Just being with you makes me happy. (:


I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say

That I love you
I have loved you all along
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go

Gah. I hate this feeling.

Phy SPA today was... okay I guess.
Pretty mind draining actually. After I was done I practically didn't even feel like checking through even when I was left with 5mins. It's just so tiring.

And madness. Zhu Song finished his experiment like super super fast. I was just about to assemble that stupid thing. 0_0

haha.

Long long day today and I'm feeling sick.
Was sneezing my way through chem extra lesson. ):
Prolly going fall sick soon.
Rate of falling sick = once per mth or even lesser.
HAHA. I bet Eve won't be surprised to see this.

To be honest, I'm looking forward to the holidays.
Even when it means more studying.
But seriously, I can't wait for it to come.
Which means no school.

I used to look forward to school so much. But now I simply dread it.

Maybe this is just a passing thing.
On my way home on the bus I thought a lot.
As usual.

Sometimes I just wish that I can stop thinking for even a second.
It gets really frustrating when you feel a whirlpool of emotions all at the same time.

And I realised I really don't know how to continue walking.
On the edge and don't know what else to give.
When all I ask is something so simple.
You promised, but it was yet another betrayed trust.

It really sux when you're looking at something crumbling down and you have no frigging idea what is going on. And the other party just won't speak or just doesn't take you seriously. To put it simply - couldn't be bothered.

Tell me what am I supposed to do.
Tell me what you want me to do.

I should just vanish.

Loving someone who's in a rush to throw you away-

-------

Omg Louis Chua.
But ya. He's right lah. I mean.
Look at me. I studied chem the whole day. Yet when I sat down to do tutorials, I blanked out.
Partly coz I was lying on the my bed and flipping through the notes and trying not to fall asleep.
But in the end I fell asleep for like 3hrs.
I'm such a pig. ):

Sighhh. I forsee me failing chem.
Ahhh. Organic chem sux. I don't know how to spot the chiral carbons on those complicated cyclic rings.
And I can't rmb a thing about the stupid addition mechanism.
Omg omg omg. ):

And yea.
I realised how fragile life is.
About slightly more than a year ago, my aunt's incident shook us all up.
Such suddeness. Unexpectedness.
I rmb me crying and crying over the phone with Jean over the other line.
And it's quite saddening to know that this world doesn't need anyone.
One person's death hardly cause any ripples in the movement of the world.
Not emo-ing.
Just reflecting.
And then I wonder how many will remember me for long if I'm gone.
Will it even make a difference to them.

Sometimes I just wish you can tell me the things that are bothering you. So I can understand what you're going through. So that you won't have to suffer alone.
So that you won't feel so far away.

I'm bored bored bored.
The TV's on and running.

Campus Superstar finals today.
Along with that nice nice channel 8 7pm show.
So I was like running around here and there so I can catch both shows.
HAHA.

I slacked through the whole day.
So dead.
So much for scoring well for Chem.
Miss Choo I'm so sorry. ):

Okayy.
The results of the top two will be out soon.
Well. I'm generally fine with any of them
though I think I like Shawn the most.
But my parents think otherwise.

Ohoh. Keely got in along with SHAWN.
Oh wow. Another 2hrs of singing.
I better wake up tmr at 6am to study.
---------

I'm just going to stand here
and see how far you'll move away from me.
How long you'll take to turn around
and realise that I'm here all along.

Something I found really meaningful from Fil's post.

Hmm. Haven't been blogging.
Didn't feel like typing for the past few days. lol.

Went for CIP on Sunday.
Woke up damn early. Went ECP.
Blahhh. Were road marshalls. So in the end we walked like 3km down to position ourselves. One person every 100m. Felt like a tree. I was stationed at the turning point and luckily Li Fang is somewhere near.

And ppl were running from all different directions and I don't know if I was supposed to direct them so I just didn't care. In the end turned out that some ppl ran like 10km instead of 6km. HAHAHA. But not my fault okay.

Blahh. Met Abah for lunch. Along with Filza and Jean. Went to the nearby food centre there. The place we chose was nice. Near the wakeboarding site then can see ppl wakeboarding and the waters were so so nice. lol.

I miss Abahmummy.
She's as black and as loving as ever. HAHA.
And I was telling Filza. That even though we haven't seen Abah for so long, yet it didn't feel weird. And she agrees too. (:



Fil. Abah. Me.

Hmm. School's boring this week.
Oh gosh.
Thank God I survived it.
And Mr Cha counted for us. We're left with like about... 11 school days before promos. The rest are holidays and study leaves.
Freaky?
Hmm. I'm still feeling unmotivated.

Stayed back in school just now to "complete" maths vectors 3 assignment. Gosh. I know nuts about planes can. I wonder how I even survive through every maths tutorial.
And Fil and I completed differentiation assignment way ahead of time as well. omggg. hahaha. So proud of ourselves.

Ytd during compass was about career thingy. And we had to do some evaluation thingy to see which category we're better in and everything. I'm better in Artistic and... what's the other one. The social one lah. Forgot what it's called.
And Mr Cha was asking who got which category so he can read out the occupations for that area.

Mr Cha: Who got (Can't rmb what)?
Cheng Yew: Me!!
Mr Cha: Ohh. Then do you want to be a....
Cheng Yew: *waits excitedly*
Mr Cha: .... Barber?

Damn funnyyyyy lah. omggg. Mr Cha so cute!
------------------

So many things are happening currently.
So many things falling apart.
I wonder what meaning is there to all these.
But I pray I'll find the reason soon.

I wonder why can't we just get along harmoniously together.
Why so many prejudices.
And why ppl make shallow comments about others when they don't even make an effort to understand.
Now then I realise how unaware I am of what's happening around me.
Maybe that's a good thing.

And it doesn't help when all you can say is
"Can't be bothered to _________"
Yeah. Maybe you really can't be bothered with me.
I don't know. That's the feeling I'm getting.
See. you don't even bother to correct my thinking and just told me to think whatever I want.

And oh gosh.
I hate this stupid phrase.
"Think whatever you want."

I wonder why ppl can say things which they don't do.
I wonder how we even ended up in this pathetic state.

I'm so sorry I can't make you smile like others can.

In the end I slacked from the time since I last blogged.

And there's cip tmr.
Going down all the way to ecp.
And it's damn frigging early.

I wanted to blog about sth but I can't put it into words.
HAHA.

Oh. I just remembered sth.
Last night I dreamt that I went Australia to study.
HAHAHAHA.
I don't know why.
Just rmb vividly that I went there with Ger and her parents. And it was like so last minute decision. Didn't even tell anyone that I was going off. HAHA.
This is so funny.
I probably miss Eve too much. lol!

But seriously,
I doubt you'll even know if I was gone.

Wouldn't it be nice if everyone just smile everytime.
Then the world will be such a wonderful place.

Today was boring.
But at least I studied.
Omg. I actually studied.

Gravitational field is amazingly managable. Read through and I understood.
Circular motion too.
Left with work energy power for tmr.

Studying can be fun at times.
Haha.

This is madness.
My parents cooked porridge for dinner.
HAHAHA.
I'll probably be hungry again in 2hrs time.

You only call me after you've had a few
You only want to hang out when you've got nothing to do
Don't tell me you love me and act like you don't
Oh, if you really want me you just gotta let me know

Random photos. Found them when I was uploading the photos from my phone to the com.
And yea. It was that day after national day celebration when Keyi, Fil, Atiqah and I went to Taka to shop. Nearly bought that dog keychain. It looks so cute but I didn't know where to hang it. lol.
And the soft toy of the 3 animals stacked up above one other is absolutely adorable. But well. I guess I get bored of soft toys very fast.

Today was a slack day.
Morning was lazy and everything. Didn't study for maths test later even though we were at study bench during pe free period. There was this stupid scene which spoilt my mood. Went canteen during recess, and yet I witnessed another stupid thing about the same issue. Sigh. Forget it.

Didn't stay for girls' soccer funfest to support our class. Really sorry.
And in the end didn't go study.
Instead I took the long bus journey to Compass Point library and borrowed books, went Kovan after that to walk around. It feels good to be alone, taking my own sweet time and choosing things. I think I can spend the whole day shopping myself. It's so fun and there's no pressure to get things done quickly as compared when you're with your friends.

And I guess I really need some peace.


Today flew past just like that. I don't even know what I've done.
Oh yes. Maths test was well... a horror? Okay maybe not. If I've bothered to think harder, maybe I'd have gotten more marks. But who cares. It's over.

I pray that tmr will be a better day. Though I'll probably try mugging for physics test but end up listening to my ipod the whole day. I'll TRY mugging.
Mustmustmust pass physics.

Hmm. Read something and it's thought invoking.

I guess one of the most precious gifts God has given us is the ability to remember. There are plenty of hurts and disappointments in life that we should forget. But good memories become a treasure chest of priceless reminders of relationships shared and joys experienced.

I thank my God upon every remembrance of you. —Philippians 1:3

Just close your eyes
Each loving day
I know this feeling won't go away
Till the day my life is through
This I promise you..

Ytd was fun.
Had lots and lots of fun self entertaining ourselves in school.
And had career seminar thingy after school. We signed up for teaching. Not that I want to become a teacher, but I also have no interest in business nor finance advising. Haha.
It was such a happy day.

But today.
There was like 180 degrees change in the mood.
It's so weird how we can get so happy one day then so moody the next.
The ups and downs of life.

Well..
There seems to be some misunderstanding and miscommunications.
But well, why can't we just spend our JC life happily. Instead of that perpetual pessimisim. Why say you hate the school so much when I don't really find any fault in it. Maybe it's the way different people think. They think differently.

And well..
Maybe we're annoying you with our constant rubbish and overexcitment over things you don't have the same interest in. But seriously, we just can't help it. Just like how you like to talk about certain things as well. It's the same logic.

And no.
We weren't thinking of dao-ing you, if that's what you think. We tried to talk, but the replies we got were pretty cold.
And we end up thinking maybe you don't feel like talking.
Misunderstandings.

What's worst is we don't even know what's wrong.
----------

Hmm. But things seem fine already. I mean. The barrier naturally lifted.
Seriously, I felt a great urge to cry during chem lecture.
Yes, even when I was sitting right infront of the lecturer.
It's just so.. saddening and stiffling.
And you know you don't want a friendship to go off the track just like that.

Well. This is not the first time something like this is happening this year.
And you know, I used to stand so strong no matter how bad it went the last time, simply because I know at least I still have you.

But you're not there for me anymore.

Now it just seems that the road ahead is so dark and hazy.
I no longer know what's up ahead still waiting to pounce on me.
One day my heart may just not take it anymore.

I just pray that tmr will be a fine day.
Relatively short. But there's the horrible maths test.
Oh yes. Today's maths class quiz was a screw up and it sort of spoilt my mood.
mrfrsohfoh gofoandfnddiefie.
Don't bother deciphering. It'll make perfect sense to those who knows the language.
I'm going to pass my maths test.
I hope.

Why must it always rain on me-

HAHAHA.

My parents came home and passed me this package thingy.
And to my surprise, it's my bday present from Eve.
All the way flown from Australia.

Though it was like excatly a week late, I still appreciate her efforts to get something for me. HAHA.
And yea, she never forgets what I like. (:
I bet when you saw that thing you went: "So Felicia-ish" Or sth like that. HAHA.
Thanks thanks thanks. You rock (:

Hmmm. And then shortly after that, another surprise came in.
Yep. That's why I'm feeling much much better now.
Probably pms-ing just now. Can't even rmb how what rubbish I wrote.

Today was fun. Well. But ytd was better.
Shall update about it the next time.
Gotta mug mug mug.
(:

You're the reason why I smile. <333

This is one rubbish entry. I just need to type something out.

I guess no one can actually understand what I'm feeling now.
Well, maybe God can.
But ya.

It's just that I can't talk to anyone about how I'm feeling. Coz they just don't know how to response. Not that I blame them.
This feeling is so stiffling.
It seems these days the only way to express my feelings is to write them down.
My written diary has become my only solitude. When all else all else seems to fall apart around me, I still have this on which to cling. The pages are a balm to my soul.

I had yet another sweet dream today. Can't rmb much as usual. But it was so nice. But when I woke up I just cried. Coz I know it's all but just a dream.

Dreams are my sweetest and only form of escape.

If I can, I'll choose to sleep forever and keep on dreaming.
At least people in there can be anyone you want them to be,
at least people in there will never change.

And yea. It's also the painful truth that my presence doesn't affect anyone at all. Whether I'm there or not it probably doesn't matter to you.

To put that in short, that simply means I'm not needed.

I so love this song.
This is amazing.
Because I never really liked Jay Chou's songs.
But yea.
I've been playing this song 1587259 times on my ipod since this morning.
hahaha.

不能说的秘密

冷咖啡离开了杯垫
我忍住的情绪在很后面

拼命想挽回的从前
在我脸上依旧清晰可见


最美的不是下雨天
是曾与你躲过雨的屋檐 oh~~


回忆的画面
在荡着秋千 梦开始不甜


你说把爱渐渐 放下会走更远
又何必去改变 已错过的时间


你用你的指尖 阻止我说再见
想象你在身边 在完全失去之前


你说把爱渐渐 放下会走更远
或许命运的签 只让我们遇见

只让我们相恋 这一季的秋天
飘落后才发现 这幸福的碎片
要我怎么捡
--------

I think it's more of the lyrics than the tune.
The tune is well.. pretty normal.
But there's sth about the lyrics that I like.
It sorts of relates to the movie.
Which is really nice.
Yepyep.

These few days have been like a roller coaster ride of emotions.
Experienced the ups and downs.
I can't point out excatly what's wrong.
Then again, I know why I'm feeling this way.
Yet any ironic comment.

It's funny when you find yourself
looking from the outisde.
I'm standing here but all I want
is to be over there.

Over there in your life.

It feels like..
I'm just someone standing at the outside looking in.
I don't even know what's going on in your life anymore.
But I'm not in any position to say anything, I know.

And after looking through everything,
I just know that you're moving forward to somewhere
where I can't reach.
No matter how hard I try
No matter how much I want.

And it hurts a lot.
Sigh.

Grabbed this from Atiqah's blog.
It's so sweet and sad and yea.
-----------

As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so-called "best friend". I stared at her long, silky hair. I wished she were mine, but she didn't notice me like that. And I knew it.

After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before, and I handed them to her. She said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her. I wanted her to know that I don't want to be just her friends. I love her, but I'm just too shy. And I don't know why.

11th Grade
The phone rang. It was her on the other end. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine. After hours, a Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep. She looked at me, said "thanks," and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her. I wanted her to know that I don't want to be just friends. I love her, but I'm just too shy. And I don't know why.

12th Grade.
The day before prom she walked to my locker. "My date is sick,"she said. "He's not going to go." Well, I didn't have a date and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates we would go together just as "best friends," so we did.

Prom night after everything was over.
I was standing at her front doorstep. I stared at her. She smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she doesn't think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said, "I had the best time,thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her. I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends. I love her,but I'm just too shy. And I don't know why...

Graduation Day
And I don't know why (Yes Atiqah, there's sth seriously missing here. HHAHA.)

A Few Years Later
Now, I sit in the pews of the church. She is getting married, now. I watched her say, "I do" and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine but she didn't see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said, "You came!" She said, "thanks!" and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her. I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends. I love her, but I'm just too shy. And I don't know why..

Funeral
years passed, and I looked down at the coffin of the girl who used to be my best friend." At the service they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years. This is what it read: I stare at him wishing he were mine. But he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it, Iwant to tell him. I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends. I love him, but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me, i wish I did too, i thought to myself, and I cried.

--------

Wa. So sad.

Then the same old story about
not having regrets will come to mind.
And how we shouldn't keep things to ourselves
and that we should just let it known.

Coz you never know when is your last breath.

Alright.
At least I did productive work today.
Like 8 tys questions of kinematics.
Woots.

I stare at you wishing you were mine. I want to tell you. I want you to know that I don't want to be just friends. I love you, and I wish you would tell me you loved me too.

Just read Sijie's blog.

Ohmygod this so SOOOOOO funny.

".... with a bloody hand he starts playing and rubble, stones and chandelier fell all around him. n he continues to play and a huge pendulum-like ball which looks capable of killing, swung in from the window and seemed to be on the point of hitting him --- everybody was shocked/nervous n i suddenly felt all funny/tickled. if a huge ball kills him in the middle of playin i tink i wil totally burst out laughing."

HAHAHHA. Oh gosh. I practically went lol when I read that underlined part.

Tried to minimise spoilers so I didn't quote the full thing.
So yepp.

So so so nice. <3

RAH.
Please snap out of it.
Stop hoping to watch it with him.
Prayed for a miracle to happen.
But I doubt it will.

Okay.
I better get off the com.

I'm still still still so high over that movie.
Oh gosh.

And ytd at like 12am plus my PW group were having phone conference. To discuss about WR. Coz none of us could understand what we were talking on MSN. So yepp.
So funny.
We were like saying "What the hell are we doing so late in the night."




:D

Wanted to paste a copy of the sypnosis of the movie from GV website. BUT they described it until so horrible. I mean. It doesn't really show how nice it is. So decided against putting it here.

Hmmm. Kd was so high over the movie as well.
That she actually msged

"ON LA PPL. SINCE FELI SO INTERESTED TO WATCH WE TREAT HER AGAIN I CAN'T WAIT TO WATCH IT AGAIN TOO OMGGGG"

HAHAHA.
And I'm planning to go watch it again.
Like seriously. Ohmy. I rmb the last time I watched A series of unfortunate events for 3 times. LOL.

I had a beautiful dream ytd.
Can't really rmb much of it. But I know it was sth nice.
So nice till I realised I was tearing when I woke up.

And I so so so want to watch the movie with you.
I'm acting like a kid.
BUT SERIOUSLY
I WANT IT SO MUCH.
sigh.

Happy national day.

Tmr's national day.

HAHA.
The performances today for celebration were nice.
But yea. I think MJ is super un-enthu. Well.. I don't know how to describe it. But in TKGS, during such celebrations, everyone will start jumping and waving and even forming train rows and running around.

BUT in MJ? Jean, Keyi and I [Fil was late coz she went for her red cross thingy at coral sec] were high-ing ourselves can.
The whole hall was so dead.
Oh gosh.

Maybe this is how it was like in mixed schools back in secondary school.
And today I realised how I will never regret going TKGS.
I mean.. At least I got to experience how nice it was in a girls' school.
Everyone were so.. friendly, enthu and yea.
A sense of belonging.
I miss tkgs ):

Oh. And so I spent half a day looking retarded in that oversized class tee.
And Econs test was rubbish. Gave up on the paper 1hr before time was up. Kept looking around and laughing to Jean, Fil and Le Dung. hoho.
Took class photo plus did cam whoring.

Blah blah blah.
Hanged out with Fil, Keyi and Atiqah at Orchard.
Then went to meet Kd, Sab and Sj at Cine to catch a movie.
AND OMGG.
'Secrets' by Jay Chou is SO SO SO nice.
GOSH.
It's like...
The BEST movie this year I've watched so far.



Such an unexpected twist.
Kd and I were trying to guess what twist issit. [Coz Sj said there will be one] But obviously everything we guessed wasn't correct.
Like...

*Male and female lead riding bicycle on a bridge*
Kd: Oh. Then they'll fall off the thing. And then die.
Me: That's the twist.

HAHAHA.
Anw. Yea. Ppl, please go watch that thing. So so so nice.
SO romantic. SO sweet and...
NICE. HAHAHA.
GOSH.

And. I really really really wanted to watch it again with you.
Sigh.
Things always don't go how you want it to be.

HAHA.
Today was a fun fun fun day.
I've always hated Tuesdays. Coz it's the day I won't have any breaks with you

But today was seriously fun.

Like during recess.
Fil and I had fun at study bench.
And on our way to GP lesson as well.

Took our own sweet time and walked up damn bloody slowly.
Initially were the first to go up, but in the end we were one of the last few.
OMG. Damn funny.

Keyi: Eh. Walk slower.
*Walks.*
Me: EHH. SLOWER.
*Walks. Sees Jean downstairs*
Me: EH JEAN! We waiting for you!
Jean: Huh? Okay.
Me: EHHH. WALK SLOWER.

Inside joke. So yea.
All your fault.

And during GP Fil, Keyi and I went to toliet to slack. Ran down from 4th level to 3rd level then ran up by the other staircase back to our class.
HAHAHA.

Thanks to the class for the wonderful celebration and the cake and the cushion thingy. I like it. HAHA. So cute and nice to hug. (:
And thanks to everyone who msged to send their wishes.
Today is probably the day I finally sent like 30+ msges in a day.
Appreciate it. (:

Today's a happy happy day. :D

But still. I miss Stella.
She said in her msg "It feels quite weird though. Coz I never spend a week planning stupid stuffs for you."

And yes. Without her surprises, it feels weird.
I'll never forget how she imported those calla lilies from holland for me. Those are flowers anw. Real flowers. Like omg. I didn't expect her to rmb that I like it. But she did.


07082006
How I was excatly a year ago.
With the flowers. HAHA.

Yepyep.
Hopefully tmr will turn out well.
Stupid Econs.
Like omgg. 3hrs of Econs. ARGH.

And I have another matter to worry about.
Like my OVERSIZED class tee-shirt. It's already an S for goodness sake.
Tmr we're wearing it. I'll probably look like an idiot. Ohmyshit. ):
Wu Suan PLEASE DON'T SLACK IN THE BAND ROOM. So I won't look like an idiot myself. HAHAHA.

Jin Jian: Felicia. Happy National Day.
Le Dung: Felicia. Happy Birthday.

Jin Jian and Le Dung's stupid annoying voices are ringing in my head now. They said that like 21387321 times today can. HAHA.
Like always.

I'm falling even more in love with you. <3
I'm serious. (:

HAHAHA.
This is interesting.

Gosh.
Finally done compiling WR.
Argh.
PW sux.

And now I'm feeling sick again.
No no no.
Please I don't want to be sick again.

3 more days.
I can't believe time passes by so fast.

Yet when you think about it, it doesn't seem to be that fast either.
Contradicting.
lol.

Sijie actually asked me for my bday wishlist. lol.
For now, I don't need wallets, pencil cases, or bags.

Nothing I need right now.
And the one thing I want I'll never have it.
At least not for now.

Well.
I haven't thought of what I want for my bday.
Doesn't matter actually.
Anything is fine.
It's the thought that counts.

Actually I'm not excatly looking forward to it either.
Stella's not here.
I miss her.
And Evelyn as well.

And oh shoot. I just remembered something someone said before.

Me: You buy me flowers for my birthday lah. Then I can say is my boyfriend give de.
Him: If you want me.

haha. The brain is such a complicated thing.
How can so many memories be stored in such a small place.
And..
Why can't I remember my physics formulae as well as I can rmb all these things.
No logic.

lol. Then again, maybe it's only me.
I don't think you can even rmb you said that kind of thing before.

Well.
Basically,
I like anything that's nice.
Nice = hahahah. I don't know how to say. Ppl like Stella, Evelyn, Sijie and co will know what I'm talking about.
Glassy things are nice. Things that are white are nice. Translucent things are nice as well.
And OH YES I WANT 'RAISE YOUR VOICE' DVD.
But that'll have to be imported I think. hahaha.
Oh maybe storybooks. I was intending to buy 'My sister's keeper' by Jodi Picoult and 'At first sight' by Nicholas Sparks.
LOL.

To be honest, I never like things from Mini Toons. 'Cards N Such' [Sp? There's a branch at TM I think.] is a pretty place.
Oh wells. I seriously don't know what I want.

Okay. I need to sleep.
Bye world.

Gymastics today was damn damn damn hilarious.
We had to work out this short routine thingy in groups. And my group consisted of the TKGIANS in 07S202.
Didn't plan out anything and thanks to lucky Jean who drew the lot, we were the first group to present. Spent that short 10-15 mins worriedly thought of something lame.

And believe me, it was very lame.
LOL.
PLUS. Wuss's injured and I can't do all the complicated stuffs. Which means our group left 3 fully functioning ppl. Just imagine.
And oh gosh. I can't believe I did that stupid pencil roll and puppy roll. HAHAHA. I wasn't even doing anything for the past 4 lessons and I'm presenting a routine. Amazing.

Our routine was pretty screwed up.
More than half the time we were busy laughing.
Coz we were banging into each other when doing the rollings. And I didn't even roll. I merely shifted myself so that I can catch up with them and so that poor Keyi beside me won't get squashed by Jean. [coz I was too slow] HAHAHHA.
And the funniest part was when Jean was stuck on her neck when she did the forward roll. And Keyi and Filza were laughing. Especially Keyi. She practically collapsed on the floor laughing after she saw that scene. I didn't get to see what Jean did. Was tying my hair I think.

I hope Miss Lim sends us the video. I wanna watch and laugh at our crazy routine. Good stress reliever.
The whole thing was damn funny. Oh gosh.


During GP remedial in LT2 on Wed. [I went on Tues. So just hang around and crap.] Pang, Lee Jin and Yong Zhi in the photo. Damn funny. Doesn't Lee Jin reminds you of a prisoner. The way he squats and everything. LOL.


During GP remedial. The girls. With Ms Pang in the picture as well. LOL.


GP remedials are slacking.

Ohoh. And Mr Cha's so sweet.

"None of you are allowed to leave the class or this school without my permission."

HAHA. Oops. I just jokingly said "I'm leaving" [Coz he asked something about if it's farewell or sth.] when Mr Cha asked why we suddenly wanna take class photo. [Teachers Day thingy]

And I think he still thinks that it's for something bad. [The photo] :/ To think he even msged me that night asking how I'm coping. So nice right.
Nahh. Mr Cha, no one's leaving!!

Went home feeling moody and everything.
And I was like already tearing on the bus. Was closing my eyes so that the tears won't flow.
I bet you don't even know that.
Not angry. Just sad. Just..
Hurt.

"If he's not there means he's not there."
Louis said this to me before.

Just what am I trying to hold on to.
Just what is left for me to hold on to.

The way you're treating me..
Maybe I'm just an annoyance.

I'm such a failure.

It probably doesn't matter to you anymore.
After all I'm just someone left behind.